Im the mother of an addict too. I have a background in public health and had some knowledge about heroin, but when I realized I had a heroin addict living with me, right in my own home, I was devistated. I tried to remember everything I had heard about enabling and drug treatment. I took my son to a treatment center and beleived him when he said he only needed detox, not rehab, and wanted to come home and go back to work. That was 14 months and 7 detoxs ago. I was beginning to feel this was a battle we could never win. By chance, I called Bucks Co Council on Alcohol and Drug Dependence in Doylestown. I just couldnt believe that there was no answer for his problems out there. They listened to my sons long story and said Penn Foundation was where we needed to go. We were there the next day - they managed to find him yet another detox bed; they really listened to him describe his drug use and determined that he needed anti-anxiety meds to help him through rehab. They provided family counseling for all of us and have coached me along daily to make sure I give him support without enabling.
As a mom, the hardest part has been realizing that I am not talking to my real son - Im talking to an addict. He looks just like my son but he speaks another language - the language of the addict. I now know that he can lie while looking me in the eye. I now know that he will steal from my wallet while Im in the next room. He can con his sister into using her car by making her feel sorry for him. But I also now know that, with the right plan and coaching, he has a chance to get away from heroin and stay away from it. He completed a week of detox and 3 weeks of rehab and was happy with his own progress.
He relapsed with other drugs recently while waiting to get a bed at a halfway house. Penn Foundation guided me through that - a time when I was ready to give up on him and just let him live on the streets as an addict. As of this writing he is in rehab at Penn, still waiting for that halfway house bed. This is the hardest thing I have ever done for/with any of my children. Im hopeful again today and trusting that I will be coached through any of the difficult days that I know we will have to face in the future.
